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TOP TEN TUESDAYS – THE TOP TEN FUNNY EDWARD QUOTES IN ‘TWILIGHT’

Posted May 26th, 2009 By: Team Switzerland 35 Comments »

You’ve seen the top ten funny Bella moments throughout the Twilight saga, and now we’re working our way through the series with Edward in the driver’s seat. Sure, he’s charming and polite, but don’t count out his quirky sense of humor.

 

So this week, TA Staffer KrazyEm brings us:
The Top Ten Funny Edward Quotes in Twilight:

10. Are you referring to the fact that you can’t walk across a flat, stable surface without finding something to trip over? (Page 212)

9. No coffins, no piled skulls in the corners; I don’t even think we have cobwebs… what a disappointment this must be for you. (Page 329)

8. Oh, a sadistic vampire, intent on torturing her to death, sure, no problem, she runs off to meet him. An IV, on the other hand… (Page 462)

7. Your hair looks like a haystack… but I like it. (Page 312)

6. You’re as white as a ghost — no, you’re as white as me! (Page 281)

5. Yesterday I kiss you, and you attack me! Today you pass out on me! (Page 319)

4. You scared me for a minute there. I thought Newton was dragging your dead body off to bury it in the woods. (Page 99)

3. I decided as long as I was going to hell, I might as well do it thoroughly. (Page 87)

2. Actually, Esme wouldn’t care if you had a third eye and webbed feet. All this time she’s been worried about me, afraid that there was something missing from my essential makeup, that I was too young when Carlisle changed me… She’s ecstatic. Every time I touch you, she just about chokes with satisfaction. (Page 327)

1. Bring on the shackles — I’m your prisoner. (Page 302)

What do you think of the list? Do you have any other funny Edward quotes from Twilight?

Have your own Twilight-inspired Top Ten list? It could be featured on TA! Send it to us at Newsblog@TwilightersAnonymous.com!







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  • kijo921

    Number 1 is PERRRRFECT!!! Everyone wants Edward to say that to them! I know I do! ;) Heehee!

  • http://www.twi-addict.blogspot.com Annie

    omg, this is amazing! you grabbed all the best ones!

  • Stefanie

    Buu and none of this was in the movie … I really didn’t like the twilight script this shouldve been in yhe movie I well let’s hope new moon is better

  • meagan

    I def agree with these, they are good ones… I’m also kind of partial to the “built in radar detector” and “I could walk home faster than this truck moves” ones as well

  • Jen C

    I would ran #6 and #4 ahead of #3 personally…

    I’m also somewhat partial to “Sorry, I don’t believe I have enough to spare” (in response to Alice’s “It sounded like you were having Bella for lunch” remark); “Would I let a tree hurt you?”; “Alice had a little too much fun fabricating evidence…you could probably sue the hotel if you wanted to.”; and “You thought that would be a black tie occasion, did you?” (about her assumption she was about to be changed)

  • twilight freek

    yer lol the 1st one was he talking to bella then i forgot please tell me!!!!!!!

  • Twilight Mom Australia

    LOL, I like those… my favorites are #7, #6 and definitely #1, kijo921 I agree with you 100%.!!!!

  • jessica

    edward is quiet witty and funny in the books
    hes not like that in the movie all he is is tortured
    i wish they made him more funny like in the books
    oh and they so SHOULD have put the blood typing scene in the movie its the best!!!

  • Lola

    really awesome and funny

    i loved the last one loooool =P

  • Angg

    Number 7 is my favorite of the whole book I think. After I read it I must of laugh for 10 minutes. The whole list is great!

  • creamy

    twilight freak: Yes, he was talking to Bella. This was in her bedroom, after they had returned from the meadow.

  • patty

    great quote some great ones : why don’t go fetch a space heater or something or for the for lvoe of all that’s holy.! haha! great uqotes. Edward says roamtnic and funny things

  • Sarah

    PERFECT list!

    Edward does have a very cunning sense of humor in the books. I really missed that in the movie as well.

    But this list is GREAT! LOVE it!

  • emmy

    OMG i love this list! Others that should be in there:
    ‘You’re worried, not because you’ll be in a house full of vampires but because they wont approve of you.’
    ‘I tell you i hear voices and you think theres something wrong with you.’
    ‘Are you still faint from the run? Or was it my kissing expertise?’

    i love top ten tuesdays! Although its wednesday here

  • twilighter_87

    LOL :D These were good, and I also agree with Jen C, Im partial to them too.
    And yes twilight freek, Edward was talking to Bella…It was after she had been held prisoner with Alice when he was gone hunting…

  • Danielle Cullen

    #8 has always been my fave quote! when i saw it i was like “OMG that’s my quote!!!” lol

  • ieshia

    I luvd #’s 5 and 3! Personally those r my favorites! :)

  • Addicted to Edward

    Edward has way too many good quotes to narrow it down to just 10! LOL

  • Caroline

    I agree. I LOVE movie Edward, but the one thing I missed about book Edward was his witty humor. Great list!

  • Charmie

    There is a reason they made him that way in the movie – first off he’s written that way by Melissa Rosenberg (who worked very closely with Stephenie Meyer) but secondly, if you read midnight sun well what is available anyways you’ll see Edward tortures himself – he truly considers himself a monster with very little redeeming quality about himself. Rob played off of that tortured soul and the manuscript he was given.

    I think sometimes as fans we don’t get the distance of it. To see that when you take a book into a film – so many things get lost. Because so much of the book is inside of Bella’s head and you can’t portray that visually on film. You have to take what you deem to be important and make a good story.

    Having said that, I think New Moon will be better than Twilight because there was alot more story to tell in the book New Moon. You have love, tragedy, grief, loss, jacob saving bella from drowning in all senses, bella finding herself, and eventually the reunion…what did twilight have but this I need you, you need me…it’s beautiful don’t get me wrong…but all great love stories have to have drama, love, passion, intrigue and not all of them have a happy ending..like romeo and juliet, pride and prejudice, Gone with the Wind….

    anyways – i’ll get off my soapbox now :)

  • twimom_13

    My favorite Edward line from Twilight it really made me feel butterflies in my stomach, was when he tells Bella “Don’t be self conscious, if I could dream, I am sure it would be about you” I am paraphrasing here. Classic sweet Edward.

  • Jen C

    Speaking of my partiality to the Alice fabricating evidence quote, can we get an Alice list after you’re done with Edward? She’s had several of my favorite one-liners…

    And props to emmy, oh how did we forget the kissing expertise remark :)

  • Addicted to Edward

    actually twilighter_87 you are referring to a scene in Eclipse.

    Edward says the shackles/prisoner line in Twilight the night after the meadow – the first time he stays overnight that Bella knows about. He says it will be harder for him (resisting her blood) if he’s away from her for any length of time and she says don’t go away.

  • Rach26

    1. Bring on the shackles — I’m your prisoner.
    LOVE IT. he can say that to me any day.

  • love him

    I liked #2 but not as much as I liked Rosalies those I think, were funnier. But the #1 is also funny.

  • MzzCullen

    i luv those quotes, but on of my fave, that they missed, is when he goes “Its the American pastime” (in response to B’s “vampires play baseball?”).

    and everytime he says i love you, but thats another story…..

  • LeslieB

    I’ll try this again. Kudos to Charmie, jump on that soapbox anytime. I recently posted comment somewhere saying that Edward in book was boring, but RP brought him to life. I have to take this back. Although I loved the way Rob played him, he did do it from the script and from Midnight Sun. I am just starting to read MS and I’m wondering which came first: the script for movie or Stephenie’s reimagining the story from Edward’s POV. I would like to know. I have just finished re-reading NM in anticipation of the movie, but based on the funny quotes, I think I need to re-read Twilight again. (Can’t tell anyone because I’m actually more a Twilight Mom type & my friends will do an intervention!)

  • Michelle

    I love the quotes, all of them. One you missed that is one of my favorites: “Yesterday I kiss you, and you attack me! Today you pass out on me!” p. 319

  • Dj Manak

    Number 8! That is my favourite quote in Twilight!! Also I love number 1 as well! =D If only he could say that to me… a girl can dream though right?!

  • ashleyyW

    “i sat at her window like a stalker…..an obsessed stalker…an obsessed vampire stalker”

  • amanda

    omE!!!! #1 is soooooo perfect!!! i love tht line in the book…. classic Edward….i also like Do I DAZZLE you???…lol

  • kat

    no-im HIS prisoner! ah sooo cute! great job!

  • #1twilighter08

    ha ha!!! i like # 2. but #1 is the best!!!

  • http://irishlass13 Erin

    “I hate driving slow” and “Enough commentary on my driving. I’m still waiting for your latest theory.”

  • TwilightLuva

    Great Quotes! But you missed out a crucial one!!!
    “Do i dazzle you?”

 

 

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